I Can't Make This Stuff Up

You know whenever you are in a group of people and the question goes around, "What is your most embarassing moment?" I hate that game, because really, I don't have a lot of them-meaning, I am pretty good at laughing at myself, because most times that is the only thing you can do. 

And then there was today. 

It was definately a "These things only happen to me" moment.  Reese has had a cough and runny nose for a couple of weeks.  At first I thought it was a virus, then I thought it must be allergies because he coughs whenever we are outside and he has been running around.  I have been debating going to the doctor, but he didn't have a fever, and was eating/sleeping well.  This morning he woke up and I could tell he did not feel good-he was super whiny, etc. I knew he was sick.  The phone lines were down at the doctor (weird, right?) so I called their "sister-office" and made an appoinment.  We head over and Reese is falling asleep in the car (it's his nap time). And I think "Perfect, Reese will sleep and hopefully Abram will just watch TV so he won't touch anything in the "sick waiting room". We go back and Reese is extra pitiful, got weighed etc.

THEN IT HAPPENED. 

I had the diaper bag strapped across me, holding Reese and he threw up.....a lot. And it just kept coming.  We are talking oatmeal, strawberries, and banana.  All down my shirt, capris, in my hair, and on the diaper bag.  The nurses frantically were getting those "throw up cups", but it was too late.  Then Abram starts to gag-because of looking at it and the smell.  So I am saying, "It's okay Reese, Abram don't look!"  The nurses were amazing! They took Abram out and gave him stickers and played with him while they cleaned in between my toes (yes, the vomit made it to my flip flops) as I stood there holding Reese in vomit.  One of them looked at me and said, "We have a shower downstairs?" -Really? Yah, could you guys watch my kids while I go take a shower? I. Wish. The vomit had soaked EVERYTHING. So I asked if they had anything-even a hospital gown I could wear.  So they brought me an XXL gown and some "shorts" they give teenagers who don't wear underwear (yes, that's what they told me-um grose. 1. Wear your underwear. 2. If you choose not to follow rule #1, then at least let going to the doctor be a speacial occasion to wear some.).  So that's what I wear, an OPEN BACK gown and teenager "shorts" (I keep putting them in quotes because they are that paper-like material).  They did a double swab test on Reese for strep and walking pnemonia, both negative. A blood test which made them think it was some sort of bacterial something, but all else looked good.  I told the doc I had family coming in town and she said that would be fine, not to cancel anything.  That he just didn't feel good, and in 24 hours he should feel a lot better.  And then he got a shot of antibiotics and a a prescription.

Did I mention our pediatrician is on a COLLEGE CAMPUS???  You know, where people go to class, whether it be walking or driving? That there are also a couple of hospitals across the street?  Yes, so if you can tell me how to gracefully carry a bag of throw up clothes, a puked on diaper bag, a sick child, while making sure your 4 year old doesn't get hit by a car, AFTER YOU GET TO WALK THROUGH THE WAITING ROOM TO GET TO THE PARKING LOT in an open back gown-please, leave a comment and let me know.  Because everyone on campus got to glance at the goods today.  I prayed all the way home that we wouldn't get in a wreck or get pulled over. 

As if that wasn't enough, I am unloading the kids from the car-and a male neighbor down the street WAVES TO ME! As if to make me totally aware, "Yes, I do see you in all your glory, hello there!" Nice.  What we Mother's do for our kids.  Poor little guy is going to miss the Easter Egg hunt tonight.  I sure hope he feels better soon. 

Mental note: Always have, not only change of clothes for the kids in the car, but some for me as well-just in case.